Yo' mamma so fat..

I wanted to write in english, so I asked a friend about what could I write about... She replied "about me", so here I am, writing about her...
First of all, I must say she is a lesbian... But not like "wow I'm such a lesbian I will rape your mother", she is like "wow I'm such a lesbian but you will never know... and I would rape your mother".
Knowing that, I first thought "what a waste" and then I said what the hell, I love french fries.
She asked for this so I want to believe she will read this and say "Oh shit how did you know I'm a Lesbian?" and I will say "I didn't, you just told me" jejeje (?)
She is not taller than a Doberman, so I usually call her Gnome.. She likes good music so I won't complain about that...
I saw her personally no more than 10 times in a 2 year lapsus... Next time I'll see her is going to be my 18 birthday ('cause I know she's coming...), and I know she will bring me the hell of a present... *cof*
What could I say about her personality? Well I could say it is like a rollercoaster... First is up, then is down, a lot of flips and twists, but you just finish in the same place you started... Talking about rollercoasters, I should go to Coast's Park(? She can come if she wants.
I don't know her much more than that, so I will stop right here and finish in some other moment.